Season Finale! For the final episode of the first season of Loose Change, I wanted to share with you a very special interview I did. I talk about my insecurities a lot on this show, so I wanted to talk with someone who consistently works at building up hers. So much so that she can battle through some of what the world throws at her.

This is a reupload, as it looks like the first time I published this episode, it didn’t make it passed the first segment. And honestly I was so in my feelings about a completely unrelated matter that I got overly angry about this and the lack of solutions I could find to fix it! But now, I’m tired and I realized I could just recreate the episode. Because duh. Let me know if it works by liking, commenting and subscribing!

I was disciplining my daughter in public and some woman decided (maybe just in my head) that I was being too mean to this little girl and just had to do something (albeit a very small something) but that set me off. And I want to (HAVE TO) talk about it.

I was going to record an episode about my husband, but when I went to record, Aria decided to throw a tantrum. But when life gives you lemons, make a podcast! C’mon, you know you saw that joke coming.

I only just realized that if I continue being honest on this podcast, which is probably essential to this podcast, I can’t really continue covering up how I feel about things in real life. 😂

This episode is entirely me externally processing, no edits. To be honest, I didn’t really feel like recording, but it’s amazing that you can discover something new just by diving a little deeper into your feelings. I also shared a little bit about how I started this podcast because tangents.

Let’s pretend that you’re sitting in a job interview and the hiring manager asks you that infamous question: “What is your biggest weakness?” And you respond, “I’m a perfectionist.” And you know why you’ve answered this way, because many people don’t view perfectionism as a bad thing, on the contrary it can be a strength! But for me, it was toxic, being a perfectionist. So now I’m in recovery and I want to talk about it.

Growing up, when our parents did something that we didn’t agree with we would often say, “When I grow up, I’ll never do that to my kid!” But parenthood is a real struggle and while I no longer hold it against my mom for trying to force me to eat broccoli or clean my room, I am looking at how my parenting style has changed over the years and how I compare it to hers.

Why do I fear making a bad impression? Why would I rather skip doing something beneficial because of that fear? How much does my race define what I will and will not do? How much of that can I change?

Do you ever feel like you are not as capable, not as talented, not as good as people believe you are? Do you feel like your taking up some worthier person’s place and you’ve faked your way into it? I’ve been a victim of Imposter Syndrome for most of my life and honestly I didn’t know there was anyway else for me to feel. But then, my life changed.